For most people who want a day off work, it’s enough to phone in claiming a dodgy tummy, a touch of the flu, or a bad cold. Some will even take the radical step of asking for a day’s holiday … in advance!
It’s generally not necessary to attack yourself with anything!!! Especially not “a boulder and a razor“!
If you’re prepared to go to that kind of extreme I think it’s fair to say that you are more than just “under stress”!